When You're Really In Love: Bacon Bouquet
Flowers, as you may well know, are the key to a woman's heart. And by heart I mean bloomers. But when you're truly in love, crappy red roses simply will not do. Enter the bacon bouquet. It looks like flowers, but that shit is bacon! You keep these things coming and you'll make your way into a woman's XL granny-pannies in no time. Now, close your eyes. Are they closed? Wait, open them. I want you to read this next sentence and then close them tight and concentrate, okay? The worst dimpled, flabby, wrinkled grandma butt your brain can come up with, GO!
Bacon Roses [bitsandpieces]
Thanks to Racheal, who, for the tip, get's a bologna bouquet. God, I'm poor, okay?!