I can't tell where the bacon ends and the pasty naked guy begins. Not that I'm worried. You think I won't eat your shield? I WILL EAT THAT SHIELD. Just try to pepper spray me, I dare you. That shit's like a condiment to me.
Thanks to Quentin, who tried to join the salami police but wasn't accepted because he didn't meat the physical fitness requirements. See what I did there? God I'm good.