Nov 24 2009Well Done: Know Your Enemy's Weak Points

know-your-enemy.jpg

This is a little cheat-sheet designed to remind you how to defeat your enemies. It might come in handy for some of you, but I don't need it because I can kill just about anything with my good looks. And by good looks I obviously mean laser blaster. Although I did defeat a mirror once with my fist. Then I took some artsy pictures of myself in its shattered surface. Holy shit I'm emo. :'( God, please don't tell anybody.

Know Your Enemy (Especially His Weak Points) [kotaku]

Thanks to Blastphemer, for two tips in one day. Darn, and I just ran out of prizes.

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Reader Comments

I just use my Go-Go Gadget Dick to cripple the ladies.... just sayin

Hooray! for Metal Gear and the Psycho Mantis fight at the bottom left! One of the best moments in video game history!

The cheat one is missing select and start.

@3 Actually Ollie you only need to press select if you have two players

From Top going down, left to right:

Weak Points indicated in color:
Pac Man Pellet > Ghosts;

The Classics: Heart (stabbed with stake), Headshot, Silver Bullet, Fire, and Cross > Dracula, Zombie, Werewolf, Frankenstein and Devil;

Shadow of the Colossus: Top of head/Lighted spot in gut > Colossus;

Super Mario Bros.: Axe behind bridge > Bowser;

Genji: Underbelly > Giant Enemy Crab;

Pokemon: Fire, Grass, Water > Bulbasaur, Squirtle, Charmander;

Mythology: Heel > Achilles;

Sonic: Floating Ship > Dr. Robutnik;

Karate Kid: Johnny, SWEEP THE LEG!

??: Slingshot > Enemy Eye?

Star Wars: Neck > AT/AT;

Men: Crotch shot > Man;

Metal Gear Solid: Player 2 Slot > Psycho Mantis;

Contra: Contra Code > Dying alot;


I missed one, does anyone know that one?

@ 1... the whole "just sayin " thing is getting old.......just sayin

Interesting that there' s no tips for killing vamps and werewolves. They're everywhere these days.

@6 wow...just sayin

Idle hands are the devils' tool

@7
How to Kill Vampires & Werewolves
by Blastphemer

Step 1: Make a movie based off of teen-chick-lit-fluff that just happens to include watered down versions of these archetypes almost as an aside to the actual plot.

Step 2: Count your money (1....1 million dollars...ah...ah...ah...ah.........2....2 million dollars...ah...ah...ah...ah............3...,etc - and YES, you have to use The Count's voice while doing this).

Step 3: Nope, that's about it. You're done. Congrats.


...readin' what i'm writin'?

@5 : The first boss from Zelda : Ocarina Of Time. Can't remember her name though... And for the 4th in classics, isn't it a jew with fire, or am I just a sick bastard ?

The Dude, the Slingshot - Enemy Eye one is from Ocarina of Time, use the slingshot to shoot Gohma in the eye - first boss in the Deku tree.

Legs of the ATAT!

Stinger missle for sniper wolf was an even more ridiculous weak spot than psyco mantis' port 2 tingmajig.

@5 Death Star! You missed the death star!

Where is up up down down left right left right b a from? Because I remember it from somewhere.

Stinger missle, sniper wolf, better than port 2 for psycho mantis.

@5 you missed the death star!

Oh crap, totally skipped the Death Star. Whoops. That's what I get for typing into notepad next to the image and working at the same time.

Ah, the Zelda reference completed went over my head. I wish I could make the image bigger.

@13:
Roping the legs don't explode the AT/AT. Watch your Star Wars again!

Thermal exhaust port is in the wrong place. It does not lie along the equator of the Death Star, but instead lies closer to one of the polar regions (watch R2's video closely for the exact location).

Besides that, funny poster.

@the dude It's still a weak point! The symbol on the collosus's chest doesn't kill it outright but it's still there.

Under the "When in doubt, cheat" looks like GTA's infamous weapons tier 3 cheat., Or 2...can't remember.

@5
Very nice list. Only 2 I didn't know was Genji and Colossus.

The slingshot one is from Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. Enemy is named Goma and is the end boss of the first dungeon in the tree.

Would also like to point out it's not "the contra code". It's the Konami code. The reason for the correction is because the code is used in a lot of games made by konami, not just contra. Off the top of my head, the games I can remember using this in are contra, hunt for red october, gradius (and gradius 3), and TMNT 3.


I think at the end of the day we can all say "this is one of the most epic posters made in a while". Kudos to the creator :)

@16 Jim

Not 100% sure on that. The exhaust port was in a trench. The trench was wrapped around the death star.

Can anyone comment on this? I consider my self a big star wars geek but everyone has their limits.

I think the picture is accurate.

someone's "weakness" might not be what actually kills them. like Achilles, it wasn't his heel that killed him, it was an infection. so the AT/AT's legs should be marked as a weakness... although, it is more awesomer to have the neck, because only people who watch it a lot will get that.

thats the human colossus from shadow of the colossus. EPIC game, i loved it. I never figured climbing the hairy backs of ginormous enemies and stabbing them in the head could be so much fun.

http://www.newpaulsmith.com/paul-smith-bags-c-520.html

If this was a shirt or poster I'd buy it!

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