The $70 Grill Alert Talking Remote Thermometer is a talking remote thermometer for your grill. You just jam the temperature probe in your choice of meat, push some buttons, and then sit in a hammock and guzzle beer while deliciousness deliciousizes itself. When the meat reaches your predetermined temperature of choice, the thing tells you it's time to slap that bitch on a plate and OM NOM the shit out of it. Pork chop sandwiches! Also, meat probe -- I have one. Ladies?