I'd Buy One: The NES Controller Mouse
Sadly, the NES Controller Mouse is only conceptual. But, if there's enough consumer interest, I'll step forward and manufacture them myself (read: collect money for pre-orders and skip the country). Capitalism baby, gotta love it. Also, self-conscious strippers and breakfast cereal options.
Thanks to Matt, Julian and RaDe, who know Count Chocula and Cap'n Crunch make the world go round. Illuminati.