Turtles Shoes: Pet Turtle Gets Tender With Somebody's Shoe
This is a video of somebody's pet turtle having sex with a shoe. It's possibly NSFW if you carry your house on your back or live in a pond. You need to watch it with audio though, because the little guy makes the cutest squeaky noises while he's going at it. Kind of like me, but with no crying in between.
Thanks Marc, who loves animals, but not in the way that shoe loves animals.