PETA, in their unending quest to make ice cream even more delicious, is urging Ben and Jerry's to start using human breast milk instead of cow milk.
On behalf of PETA and our more than 2 million members and supporters, I'd like to bring your attention to an innovative new idea from Switzerland that would bring a unique twist to Ben and Jerry's. Storchen restaurant is set to unveil a menu that includes soups, stews, and sauces made with at least 75 percent breast milk procured from human donors who are paid in exchange for their milk. If Ben and Jerry's replaced the cow's milk in its ice cream with breast milk, your customers--and cows--would reap the benefits.
The breast is best! Won't you give cows and their babies a break and our health a boost by switching from cow's milk to breast milk in Ben and Jerry's ice cream? Thank you for your consideration.
Well, they do have a point there, the breast is best. But still -- human breast milk ice cream? I dunno....
UPDATE: LEGIT! Two scoops of Mammary Madness please!
Thanks to The Superficial Writer, who, despite the tip, is still a major dick.