Chios, Greece doesn't celebrate Easter with dyed eggs and a big chocolate bunny. No sir, they do it up right -- with two churches firing thousands of fireworks at one another. The tradition dates back to 1889 (OLD!), when Ottoman forces confiscated the islander's cannons and the locals were forced to fight back with homemade rockets. Awesome! Though in retrospect, I'm thankful my church didn't do this when I was growing up. Because then I would have been an altar boy -- and we all know what happened to them...they stole sacramental wine and grew up to be drunkards. Just kidding, they got their asses touched. So yeah, thanks for the grope-free ass, Church of No Fireworks!