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Tom Selleck Cake Is Chest Hair Delectable

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If there's one thing I learned from watching every single episode of Magnum P.I., it's that I want to live in Hawaii and drive a Ferrari. If there are two things I've learned it's that I want to live in Hawaii and drive a Ferrari, and then lick Tom Selleck's chest hair in the most non-sexual mancrush way possible. Well birthday girl Emma got the next best thing when her friend Alicia Poicia made her a sweet Tom Selleck cake.

I will admit, this cake did not turn out how I envisioned. I initially imagined nipples, a bigger portrait area, and better bordering, lettering, and so on. I found myself running out of time, so the bordering, the lettering, and flowers were tremendously rushed and overall half-assed. Thus, they really bother me to look at.

Oh, don't be so hard on yourself Alicia. I didn't even notice there were flowers on the cake. I was too busy staring at the wormy man-hair covering Tom's glistening chest. Did I mention I like the mustache? I like the mustache. You can almost hear it asking, "Hey ladies, wanna go for a ride?" Oh oh, I do Tom, I do!

What's Better than Tom Selleck? A Tom Selleck Cake! [seriouseats]

Thanks Mariah, you think you could make me something similar for my birthday? But, you know, with real hair?

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