Guy Scores Himself A DWI On Cooler Scooter
Well folks, they finally got me. After months of (relatively) incident free cooler scooting around town, I finally scored my first DWI while doing 13 MPH down the sidewalk.
Leslie J. "Bomber" Marr, 57, was charged with driving while intoxicated and aggravated unlicensed operation of a motor vehicle after the police saw him swerving on the street and driving on the sidewalk in his "Cruzin Cooler," Whitehall Police Chief Richard LaChapelle told the Post Star newspaper.
Marr's electric-powered cooler was filled with 14 beers and has room for 24 cans and ice, Fox News reported.
These jackasses have the story all wrong. First off, my name is Leslie J. "Mad Bomber" Marr, and secondly, there were only 12 beers left because I slammed two before the cop got out of his car.
Under New York state law, driving any motorized vehicle must be done without alcohol, including motorized coolers. In various states, other modes of transportation in which driving is prohibited while intoxicated include lawnmowers, boats, bicycles, golf carts, wheelchairs and horses.
Wow, no drunk wheelchairing, huh? Why don't we just go the extra mile and make being handicapped illegal too?
Thanks Jacob, now everyone's gonna make fun of me