Maze Lock Guarantees You'll Perish In A Fire
Is escaping your home in case of an emergency too easy? Need more of a challenge escaping during a fire? How about adding the Defendius Door Chain from Art Lebedev (maker of the Optimus Maximus). As you can see it's a maze. A maze of death. By fire. No word on price or if the damn thing is even real, but if you really want a challenge trying to get out of the house I'm your man. For $30 I'll stand in the doorway attacking you with a can of mace and taser while you try to get by. Slip me an extra fiver and I'll even bat you in the nuts a few times.
UPDATE: Turns out it was a hilarious April Fools joke! AHAHAHAHHA. So funny. *wipes tear* Thanks a lot Jack, you dick.
Defendius door chain [artlebedev]
Thanks to Jack (not the island guy), who can solve mazes and word searches in record time, for the tip