Carl Lewis, a man best known for running fast as hell and winning 9 Olympic gold medals, has created a new piece of exercise equipment. The Vibro-Exerciser allegedly gives you 70% more benefit than regular exercise alone. It does this through "vibration training that taps into your â€œsubconscious muscle responsesâ€ to help reduce fat and improve circulation." Now I'm pretty sure this thing doesn't work, because stuff like this has existed forever and everyone is still fat as hell. But I'm no gold medal Olympian. Maybe Carl Lewis knows something I don't. Hell, I can't even run. Unless it's to 7-11 for a case of beer and pack of smokes. And even then I'm only running figuratively, because I'm driving.