Geekologie I Watch Stuff The Superficial Hedonistica

Walking Into Mordor: Middle Earth As A Google Map

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Note: This isn't even the whole map, full-size version right HERE so you can plan your next vaycay.

This is an imaginary Google Map of Middle Earth created by Redditor mbingcrosby. It's just a Photoshop job though, not an actual interactive map. Now this right here IS an interactive map of Middle Earth, it's just not in the style of Google Maps. I could probably draw a Venn diagram comparing and contrasting the two, but that would make me a dork and I'd have to give myself a swirly and I haven't cleaned my toilet recently enough to feel comfortable doing that.

Thanks to PYY, who doesn't need a map because everywhere you go, there you are.

The Faces Behind The Voices Of Disney Villains

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This is a short video from Buzzfeed showing the faces of 12 voice actors behind infamous Disney villains. It was nice to finally put a face to Ursula's voice. Speaking of Ursula -- I'd trade my voice and legs for a fin in a heartbeat if it meant she'd wrap those beefy tentacles around me. Ooh, I'll also need gills or I'll drown.

Keep gong for ht vidoe (I typed that with my face).

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It's Kinda Cute: Rare Megamouth Shark Washes Ashore

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This is a photo of an incredibly rare-to-see (on account of living in the deep sea) 15-foot megamouth shark that washed ashore in the Philippines this week. Apparently there have only been 60 confirmed megamouth shark captures and sightings to date. That's pretty rare. It kind of looks like a Pokemon. Megamouth shark -- I choose you! Uh, Megamouth? MEGAMOUTH! *poking with a stick* "It's dead." Go forth, Megamouth -- your training is complete.

Keep going for one more shot of the freaky deaky monster. It doesn't even look real.

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For All Your Witchcraft Needs: Freaky Mouth/Ear Candles

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These are the mouth and ear candles made and sold by Etsy shop uncannyartshop. They cost $18 apiece and come in 15 different scents. Sadly, burning flesh isn't one of them. The ear one kind of reminds me of Sloth from the Goonies. HEY YOU GUYS! Who else was jealous of Sloth and Chunk's friendship in the movie? They seemed like, really good pals. I wish I had a good pal. Will you be my friend? "No." Will you pretend to be my friend? "Maybe." That's a start. Next stop: BFF's!

Hit the jump for several more shots.

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A Peek At Jurassic World's Genetically Modified Dinosaur

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This is the first peek (if you can call a silhouette a peek) at Indominus Rex, the genetically modified killer dinosaur the scientists in Jurassic World decided it would be a good idea to play God and create. *shaking fist* You fools! Just kidding, I'd still hit it.

We set out to make Indominus the most fearsome dinosaur ever to be displayed at Jurassic World. The genetic engineers at our Hammond Creation Lab have more than delivered. At first glance, Indominus most closely resembles a T. Rex. But its distinctive head ornamentation and ultra-tough bony osteoderms can be traced from Theropods known as Abeliosaurs. Indominus' horns have been placed above the eye orbit through genetic material hybridized from Carnotaurus, Majungasaurus, Rugops and Giganotosaurus. Fearsome indeed.


Indominus' roar is estimated to reach 140-160db--the same as a 747 taking off and landing. And it can reach speeds of 30 mph...while confined to its enclosure. Come experience Indominus Rex for yourself beginning this summer. If you dare.

Obviously, Chris Pratt will have to come along and save the day and melt my heart all over again and I will buy a poster of him and hang it above my bunk bed and if they don't sell posters then I'll make my own in Photoshop and we'll live happily ever after, the end.

Keep going for a shot of its enclosure and a closeup of its snout.

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Millions And Millions Of Tiny Red Crabs Migrating

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These are several videos capturing the annual migration of millions and millions of tiny red crabs across Christmas Island, near Indonesia. Once a year in October/November the entire population migrates from the forests to the coast to bang each other on the beach and make babies. How romantic. UH UH UH UH UH (That's the sound of crabs humping).

Keep going for three portrait-mode videos (the last one is my favorite).

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Glowing Earbud Cord Pulses To Music, Your Heartbeat

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This is the already funded Kickstarter for $150 Glow Headphones. Glow headphones (wait -- did that say $150?) come in red, blue and green and contain a laser and light-diffusing fiber cord that pulses to the music you're listening to. OR your heartbeat (provided they meet their $1,000,000 stretch goal on Kickstarter). Me? Because I'm just a figment of your imagination I don't actually have a heartbeat. Here: put your head to my chest and listen. What do you hear? "Your stomach rumbling?" Wrong, that's my left tit begging for a squeeze. Well -- go on!

Keep going for a couple more pictures and their Kickstarter video.

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Father Customizes Two Barbie Dolls Into Sarah And The Goblin King From Labyrinth For 7-Year Old Daughter

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These are the Barbie dolls father and Imgur user uhjess customized into Sarah and Jareth the Goblin King dolls from the masquerade ball scene of Labyrinth. He did an amazing job, and you can see photos of the entire customization process HERE. Still, it did kind . of bother me that a man so skilled and with such an eye for detail can't take a decent photo of the finished product. That always boggles my mind. Air conditioning too. Don't act like you understand it.

Keep going for several more shots of the finished products.

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