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Harry Potter Fan Paints First Page Of Sorcerer's Stone On Living Room Wall

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This is Harry Potter fan Meredith McCardle and her living room wall. She used a projector to trace the words from the first page of Sorcerer's Stone on it, then painted it all in over the course of three weeks. It looks good. She even painted the electrical wall plate. That was a nice touch. It's all about the details, you know? I don't know. I tried painting my living room wall and ended up punching four holes through it and now I can access my bedroom closet from the sofa. Granted it's never come in handy, but I can do it. My landlady said I probably won't be getting any of my deposit back but I plan on burning the building to the ground when I move anyways so it's whatever.

Keep going for a couple shots of the process.

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Taste The Rainbow: Glass Gem Corn Looks Like Candy

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This is Glass Gem Corn. It's a corn varietal with different colored kernels. I would have called it Rainbow Corn myself, but that's just me and I'm way better at naming things than some people. *ahem* Adam and Eve! The corn may look like candy, but there's no way it tastes as good but is probably DECENT lathered in melted butter and rolled around in your mashed potatoes and peas for good measure. You can buy a 50-pack of seeds HERE if you've always dreamed of growing your own rainbow corncobs to put up your rump. Hey, I'm not here to judge, I'm here to try to grow rainbow cucumbers for the exact same reason. Still, you know what's even better than Glass Gem Corn? Glass Shard Corn. It's perfect for when you're cooking for your enemies. TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL! Jk jk, in the living room at the kid's table my mom set up. Where's my sippy cup?!

Hit the jump for a couple more shots of the undigestible rainbow.

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Angel!: Cat With Broken Jaw Gets A Perma-Smile

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Meet Duchess The Miracle Cat. Duchess was hit by a car and suffered a broken jaw and other complications because getting hit by a car complicates things. She was taken to the Adobe Animal Hospital in Texas where vets decided to operate and give her a second chance at life instead of euthanizing her. I respect that and hereby declare her queen of the derps.

"Most places would've just euthanised her, but by some miracle Duchess got lucky and Dr. Meyer took a chance and repaired her jaw," said Crystal Tate, Duchess' owner. "She was in recovery for about a month, she was on a feeding tube and lots of medicine. Her chances of survival were slim, but she was a fighter and pulled through. I met her the day I arrived at the clinic for my first day and ended up bringing her home with me less than a week later."

Happy endings. If I got hit by a car there is absolutely no way doctors would do anything but euthanize me. 'Just morphine him to death' I imagine the doctor saying without even looking up from his Sudoku. Then later, after he solves his Sudoku and actually looks at my chart, 'Scratch that, he's got the cheap insurance. Somebody give me a pillow.'

Keep going for two more shots, one of which is pre-surgery. A ton more photos at Duchess's Facebook page HERE.

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The Video Game Development Career Flowchart

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This is a flowchart created by the folks at Sharkbomb Game Design Services to use to see where you fit in for a career in video game development. You can buy a print of the thing HERE in case you're looking for that perfect flowchart to decorate your cubicle wall. My cubicle wall is all push-pins I made in the shape of a penis. I tried to use this chart to see where my video game development career will take me but I couldn't figure out where to start so it's probably best I stick to what I'm doing now which is not developing video games. I develop LOVE GAMES. Just kidding, I alienate every person who's ever loved me because I'm a monster. A MONSTER TRUCK. Vroom vroom hop in and let's crush some cars.

Thanks to carey, who's developing a video game development career flowchart to see if you should even use this flowchart.

You've Gone Too Far: Soda Flavored Pop-Tarts

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These are the A&W Root Beer and Orange Crush flavored Pop-Tarts that are a real thing because vomiting on your way to work is all the rage. I doubt I'll ever try them even when they have the orange Manger's Special sticker on them when they're trying to get rid of them at the grocery store because who the hell is going to buy these things. "Honey, look what I got you from the store today." Awwwww, I love you, mom. I bet these are gonna be great.

Thanks again to Allyson S, who's holding out for Mountain Dew Code Red Pop-Tarts because she knows what's up.

I Just Need Four More Friends: Giant 5 Person Hammock

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This is the $500 Bunyanesque Hammock available from (where else?) Hammacher Schlemmer. It measures 8-feet by 15-feet and can support a whole bunch of kids or up to five 200-pound adults. Apparently it was named after Paul Bunyan because he was a big dude. I'm also a big dude but they didn't name the hammock after me because I didn't put my name in the hat. I did put my name in the Goblet Of Fire but Dumbledore disqualified me because he said I'm too stupid to wizard. I tugged on his beard and it's real though.

Thanks to Allyson S, who won the Triwizard tournament her senior year and has the eternal glory to prove it.

Prayers Do Get Answered: A Pizza Box Made Out Of Pizza

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This is the Pizza Box Pizza available from Vinnie's Pizzeria in Brooklyn. Previously: their $5 pizza slice with smaller and smaller pizza slices on top. Clearly Vinnie's is an innovator when it comes to pizza. I like that about them. Sure the Pizza Box Pizza will probably taste like the back seat of somebody's Prius, but that's a small price to pay for superior edibility. Besides, cardboard pizza boxes aren't good for anything but my dog trying to dig out of the trash anyways. WHICH SHE DOES. I'm looking at you, Margaret! Margaret is my dog's name FYI. She's a little 11-pound mutt dog. She likes to lay on me but I don't like it when her bare butt touches my arm.

Keep going for one more shot.

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You Know How I Feel About Fire: Glass Whoosh Bottle

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This is a short video of a whoosh bottle. I think there's alcohol inside. I used to do this with lighter fluid and a 2-liter plastic Coke bottle but that was not nearly as cool. The sound this thing makes is incredible. Apparently it's dangerous though and the bottle can explode and kill you but obviously it's worth it.

Hit the jump for the video.

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